Wednesday, March 23, 2011

අවසන් නිමේෂය..

මැදියම් රැයේ විකසිතව හිනැහෙන්න
තුසර පැන් වළාවෙන්
සුමුදු පෙති දොවාලන්න
බලා සිටියෙමි මා
 නැගෙනහිර කඳු කවුළුවෙන්
සුපුන් සඳ පායන තුරු..

සඳ හිමියනි,
නුඹට පමණයි පුබුදුවාලියහැකි 
මා..

ඒත් අද සඳ නෑ
මුළු රැයම කළුවරයි
සරාසඳ යන්න ගොස්
කළු වළාවක සැඟවිලා
හෙට රැයේ යළි පිබිදෙන්න
වරම් නැත මට..

හිමිදිරියේ කාටත් හොරා
මුකුලිත වෙලා යන
කඩුපුල් මලක් මම..

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Yalini Dream


A simple girl..
Walks in to TrikonE carrying a shopping bag and disappear to upstairs..
People gather in anticipation of experiencing complexity in simplicity..
Time passes..
“Upeksha, Can u ask them to stay away a bit? I want to see the lights.” She says..
We all are shut away..
Anticipation goes up a notch..
7.00 pm on 15th March 2011
A simple introduction..
All eyes focus in to one..

Wounds unkissed..
Cleft..
Safety zones..
A wedding..
Circles of sin..
Story of Butterfly and Firefly..
Next to the divine..

She smiles in her own satisfaction
She cries in confusion
She screams in frustration
She struggles to live

People smile, cry, scream and struggle with her

She brings out the guilt within us for being alive
For being ourselves
For trying to judge
For being happy in spite of the suffering that floats around us

She reminds us that we are still human beings
Still breathing..
Still grasping whatever we can..

She urges us to live..

“Thank you” she says..

I am confused..
Is it finished? Already?

A portrait of a life within one hour.




Saturday, March 12, 2011

Pursuit of Love

This is a short love story that resembles so many others.
I came to him when he was already on his way somewhere else. We entered in to each other’s lives too early and too late.
I sought the absolute security, protection. A great need to belong. He sought the mother, arms that would open to him, warm and without complications.
Our boundless need for each other, for what the other one should represent the powerlessness when something went wrong. Perhaps our love originated in the loneliness we both had known before. His dream was the woman who had been created in one piece. But I crumbled in to all kinds of bits and pieces if he wasn’t careful. In a way each seeded a revolution in the other. I opened to him so completely. Not only physically but like human beings related in a secret way.
After a short time I was confronted with his jealousy, violent and without bounds. I had never experienced such a thing before. Friends and family, even memories became a threat to our relationship. Terrified, I felt I only had him. Everything that was familiar to me was many miles away- people, fragrances, sounds, experiences. I was cut off from everything that earlier had been my life in the process of searching for a new life within myself. When his jealousy had placed limits on my freedom, I entered in to his territory in order to create the same limits there for him. I experienced my own security only as far as I could control his life. Our needs were impossible to satisfy. That became our hell, our drama.
He saw his own vulnerability and his own anger in me, despite the fact that I was a woman and much younger and perhaps unlike him in ways that he didn’t know. I wanted to be his, and if he had wanted me to change, I would have done anything. Maybe it is possible to change together, develop together. But if one becomes the mirror of the other, one will be forced to leave the other person who will always be a reminder of what he no longer wishes to be.
I am no longer blind to his faults and weaknesses, as I have been at the beginning. I notice that he is insecure but stimulating, that he is in vein and egoistical. And I discovered to my surprise that this is love. Something had been crushed in me and something was more alive. I have undergone a change. I wanted a child from him because I felt that he will leave me shortly and I wanted to keep a part of him always with me.
For a period of time we took each other’s hands and had been painfully connected.
But only when it will be all over we would become true friends.